It’s been some time since I logged on and blog... i some time wonder who am i blogging for? What difference does it make if they read or not? But i guess it’s more for myself, for me to remind myself of the mistakes or memorable moments from the past, to reflect on my life and keep track of my progress.
It’s been 2 months plus ever since i’m in school. I should say it’s an eye –opener for me , from getting to meet different people and working together with them. Of course there’s time you will have your difficulties with your team members but that’s all part of learning and how you tackle and overcome these issues. I have completed my first UT. Results aren’t that good. Mostly C’s n B. Next week UT2 is coming...god save me!! Haha.. Thankfully my daily grades aren’t that bad so I’m really depending on them to help me pull through..
I found myself a part-time job in F&B line. $5 per hour, not bad for a part-timer’s starting pay. There are few reason why I’m taking up this job, Firstly since i have my bike to support now and pay for he’s instalment i need this. I don’t want to be going up to my dad asking for money every time, I just don’t feel right, i always felt i should be already supporting him financially. Second reason is i realise i have too much Free time on my own..Literally “ON MY OWN”.. and i think that’s not something good.. i want to keep myself occupied, make myself tired with school and work so that i won’t have to go through the nightmare of having sleepless nights and ending up getting depressed over certain matters. I don’t wish to go back to those days again!!!
It’s been a week now since i’m in work, been learning alot of things from setting up tables to providing information to customer on the menu. I know it’s going to be tough and i might end up burning out myself but this is something i willing to take the chance on to avoid myself from becoming a depressed kid. I hope this helps and HE gives me the strength to cope well with both school and work.
My only uncle got married last month; my family went to witness the function at KL. A side of my Mom that i saw that really left me with trauma and it triggered something in me. I felt bad for the bride. My mom’s been away for a month now, she’s in India with her family. I really miss her presence at home though and my little sis too.
Why is it that i feel you’re not yourself when you’re with me? Why is it that i feel i’m like trapping your air and you’re made to suffocate in my presence? It’s painful to see you in that state.. I want you to be yourself, i want us to have conversations just like how you have with your other friends, And what i Really want is you to be HAPPY. I know i have issue over my conversation skills, maybe it’s entirely my fault for being such a bore so If i’m acting like a barrier to your happiness, then i want it removed.
From far i shall care and in silent i shall continue...
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